Lynette Kua Embraces Self-Love After Years of Hair Struggles

After over a decade of concealing her hair loss, 29-year-old Lynette Kua has made a transformative decision to embrace her bald head, marking a pivotal moment in her journey toward self-acceptance. Standing at 1.83m, Kua’s presence is striking, particularly with her close-cropped hairstyle and a delicate tattoo adorning her scalp. In October 2024, she chose to shave her head, a bold step that symbolized both aesthetic preference and personal liberation.

Kua’s decision came after years of battling trichotillomania, a psychological condition characterized by compulsive hair-pulling, often triggered by stress or boredom. This disorder not only affects physical appearance but also deeply impacts self-identity, particularly in a society like Singapore, where long hair is often equated with beauty. “I was very tired of wearing something to cover my head and constantly hiding,” Kua reflected during an interview at a café in New Bahru.

The journey began in her junior college years when academic pressures took a toll on her mental health. Despite a strong performance in secondary school, Kua found herself overwhelmed by the intensity of her studies. “It was the first time in my life where I worked very hard for something but couldn’t achieve what I wanted,” she recalled. In moments of stress, she began to pull her hair, discovering that the act provided an immediate sense of relief.

Kua’s struggles escalated as she entered a “trance-like” state while pulling her hair, leading to noticeable bald patches. Her mother, initially unaware of the underlying issue, sought help from various hair-loss clinics. Eventually, a psychiatrist at the National Skin Centre diagnosed Kua with trichotillomania and depression. The formal diagnosis was a double-edged sword; while it provided clarity, it also brought feelings of shame. “I felt like I got caught red-handed,” she admitted.

In an attempt to cope, Kua began wearing wigs, which she described as both a protective shield and a constant reminder of her insecurities. While she initially opted for synthetic wigs that appeared glossy and unrealistic, she later transitioned to human-hair wigs that offered a more natural look. Despite this, the wigs became a source of anxiety. “The more stressed I got, the more I pulled my hair out,” Kua explained, describing a vicious cycle of stress and hair loss.

The discomfort with her wigs culminated in several embarrassing moments, including a performance mishap where her wig fell off on stage. Eventually, Kua decided to pursue dance more seriously, which required her to confront her hair struggles head-on. “The wig was restricting me,” she noted, realizing that it hindered her ability to dance freely.

In 2022 and 2023, Kua ventured to South Korea and the United States for dance training, during which she opted for bandanas instead of wigs. The transition was liberating. “That’s when I realised it was all in my head,” she recalled, noting that her friends easily accepted her new look. This newfound confidence led her to explore more ways to express herself authentically.

By 2024, Kua was ready to take the drastic step of shaving her head entirely. “To a girl, it’s very scary to shave your head,” she admitted, reflecting on her initial fears of appearing unattractive. However, the act of shaving her head provided immediate relief from the compulsive urge to pull her hair. “After shaving my hair, I couldn’t hide behind the way I looked anymore,” Kua said, emphasizing the importance of facing her true self.

In addition to shaving, Kua underwent scalp micropigmentation, a procedure that creates the illusion of hair follicles, further enhancing her self-image. While her father embraced her new look, her mother struggled to accept the change, often expressing a desire for her daughter to conform to traditional beauty standards. “When I see Lynette suffering and in pain, I am also in pain,” her mother shared, highlighting the emotional complexities of their relationship.

Despite the challenges, Kua found solace in her journey. In December 2024, she traveled to Thailand, where she began conducting interviews with locals about perceptions of beauty and hair. The responses were overwhelmingly positive, leading her to share her story on social media platforms like TikTok and Instagram. “I could make someone feel less alone – that feels very important,” she remarked, as messages of support and solidarity flooded in.

Kua acknowledges that while her journey with trichotillomania is ongoing, she feels a significant shift in her perspective. “The real work was never really about stopping myself from pulling my hair,” she stated. “It was about making peace with myself.”

As she reflects on her experiences, Kua emphasizes that beauty transcends physical appearance. With her wig now a relic of her past, she expresses comfort in her identity. “I’m quite comfortable with the way I look,” she concluded, radiating a newfound confidence. “I want to look like this. It’s not because I have a hair condition.”

Kua’s story serves as a powerful reminder of the importance of self-acceptance and the ongoing struggle many face with mental health issues. Through her journey, she hopes to inspire others to embrace their authentic selves, regardless of societal expectations.